holding back? what's that?

It’s been a little over a month since I started working. I have been living on my own (actually, with my housemate Mikee Retirado) since May 8.

A routine for my workday has been established in that month. Around an hour before I start work, I have time to sit somewhere and have coffee with a notebook, pen and book in hand. My thoughts have an hour to run free and now I feel like sharing some of these thoughts.

1) WHY

A lot of people would ask themselves at some point in their working lives “Why do I do what I do?”

My answer came to me a few days ago. I have realized that I like my job and I think I’m falling in love with it. It’s not easy. I have reached points of great frustration that I haven’t really encountered before but several parts of it keep me excited and intellectually stimulated. No day is the same. I don’t think any will be.

But when that honeymoon feeling is set aside, I find other reasons why I wake up every morning for work. 

I want to be able to give my family a good life. “Family” being the one I have now and what I will be having in the future (Yes, I do want to become a mother when I’m ready). I want my kids to go to good schools, have enough opportunities, have choices. I want to have a comfortable family life that will be able to produce very useful citizens of the world.

2) BALANCE

Everyone’s probably sick of hearing how different work is from school. But I don’t think anyone’s oriented me fully on how different work-life balance is from school-life balance.

School pretty much took up our entire lives. For us dormers, we actually lived in school. So school made our world go ‘round: the grades, graduation, orals, the next exam, the next paper’s deadline. That’s what ran our days amidst the gimmicks, orgs and social (love, for some) life we had in between. And for good reason, I think. Our futures rested on that diploma. School ruled our lives as we couldn’t keep our eyes off the prize and distractions were not welcome.

With work, you have to be very careful to not let it consume you as this is, as what the clichés all say, the real world. You are creating your life right here, right now. And LIFE is not just your career.

3)  BE CURIOUS

Being curious, for me, means to love learning and to keep asking questions about new and old things. That’s the way to keep your work and life not boring and feel like life and not a chore. Note: I believe that the only person who can keep you from getting bored is you.

National Geographic had it right. Living curious is the key to a life that is really being LIVED. But it doesn’t apply to nature alone. It includes your work (which can be quite routinary after some time) and every other aspect of your life. Be a life-NERD, life-GEEK.

Revel in everything new that comes into your life. LOOK for something new and one-of-a-kind in whatever you do. See it as an opportunity to add to your knowledge. And believe me when I say these opportunities are EVERYWHERE. The simple act of observing traffic can give you so much.

Once you have this unquenchable desire to learn more and the ability to find lessons in everything, you will never stop and you will never get burnt out. You will always want to learn more and you WILL find more to learn. Then you’ll be poised for greatness.

4) KEEP THE FAITH

Keep the faith is not only about the religion you make yourself a part of. It’s also about believing in the people around you.

Prejudice is everywhere. We’re not blind to that. Most of us probably have been victims and witnesses of prejudice too often that we have become numb to it. Consequently, many of us fail to notice the negativity prejudice brings into our lives.

Say that you are one who is so prejudiced that even before you’ve spent enough time with a person, you’ve already tagged them as this or that. It limits YOU. It holds you back from exploring all the possibilities you can have with one person as the tags don’t come off easily. It’s worse if the tags are NEGATIVE.  Whenever you face that person, the negativity precedes the person.

Can you imagine what that does to you, the one who beholds the negativity? It WILL eat you up.

So believe the good in people and things – or at the very least just be open to whatever may come. Let things and life unfold on its own and don’t pre-empt it. But don’t be a doormat. Just know when to draw the line, see REALITY and act accordingly.

5) KNOW WHOM YOU LOVE

Identifying the loved ones in your life, it’ll be one step closer to not taking any of them for granted. We forget how humans are bound to die and it’s a just a matter of when and how it will happen.

So keep the ones you love reminded that you love them. It can be tiring, cheesy, put you at the risk of rejection, and a bunch of other bad things that are scary and hurt. But it’s probably the most rewarding and transcending thing you’ll ever experience in your life.

Part 1 done.